Am I the Only Mama

So we have things in our house that we don’t say.  The list includes such things as:

Shut up
I don’t like

Caitlyn does a great job not saying them.  The hardest one for her is “I don’t like.”  She often has to stop herself to say “I don’t a-fer (prefer).”

Sue glories in driving Caitlyn crazy by saying stupid.  One day I found her all alone in the kitchen, staring out the window onto the driveway.  There was no one around, but she was saying “stupid, stupid, stupid” over and over until Caitlyn came in to yell, “mommy Sue is saying stupid.”  Then Sue quit.  I didn’t even have to correct it.  Sue was satisfied once Caitlyn was irritated.  Ahhh the joy of sisterhood.

We did have an issue with Sue saying hate.  We tried ignoring it, then gently correcting it. Ultimately, I had to pull out the big guns, “if you say that again mama is going to put soap on your tongue.”  Again came around, so mama had to make good on her threat.  I grabbed the liquid soap, got a little on my finger, and went for the tongue.  She was a squirming mass of flesh and I would be very surprised if I even got any on her tongue, but it worked.  We stopped hearing it.  Even Sue noticed.  A couple days after the soap, she commented, “I’m not saying Hate anymore mommy!” 

She was very proud and so was I!

They both find joy in yelling “BUSTED” when they hear someone say stupid.  This is sometimes embarassing.  Like the time we went to daddy’s work and his boss said the aforementioned word.  Caitlyn whispered to me, “mommy, he said STUPID.”   Sue had no such restraint.  She stopped the world to say, “BUSTED!”

Guess who gets busted the most?  Yup, that would be mommy.  I am forever getting in trouble for stupid.  Ugggghhhhh.  And sometimes for shut up.  It is funny and frustrating to hear “busted” again and again, but not as bad as the “busting” I got through the innocence of Caitlyn a few weeks ago.  We had not told the girls not to say damn or hell.  They are not words heard often in our home, or so I thought.

The other day I was getting something out of the fridge.  Caitlyn was standing at the fridge door with me.  Something fell out and I said, “Oh!!!!” And stopped myself.  Caitlyn, my ever helpful daughter, said “dammit!”   Daddy met my eyes.  We both knew who was the guilty party.

It really hit home.  Several applicable scripture verses came to mind including, Proverbs 25:11 The right word spoken at the right time is as beautiful as gold apples in a silver bowl, New Century Version.  That was definitely not the right word to hear.  And definitely not the right word for my daughters to be hearing.

And “You snakes! You are evil people, so how can you say anything good?  The mouth speaks the things that are in the heart.” Matthew 12:34 NCV.  Oh the truth in there hurts so bad.  I knew she had heard it from me and I knew that for all the times she heard it, I had muttered it in my heart several more times.

It is time to root them out.  I don’t want that in my heart in the first place.  I do not desire my children, or anyone, to see or hear my evil-ness.  So I have to replace those words and thoughts with something else.  I am spending more time reading the Bible and listening to Christian music.  I have to put good in if I want good to come out.  I am not perfect. Nor do I think I will be any time soon, but I can continue to be a work in progress.  As the Sunday School song says, “I am a Promise, I am a Possibility, I am a great big bundle of Pontentiality! And I’m a learning to hear God’s Voice and I’m a Tryin’ to make the right choice, I’m a promise to be anything God wants me to be!”

Survive til you Thrive!

3 Responses to Am I the Only Mama

  1. You are not alone!! 🙂 We have that exact same list, with the addition of "freaking" which is MY weakness word. I find myself uttering it (and stupid, and shut up) when I'm frustrated or annoyed. I try to tell my kids that I'm the adult so I can say words they can't, but even as I say it, I feel like a failure. :-/ Thank you for sharing the scripture – it will come in handy and it will hopefully remind me that I need to be setting the example, not making myself the exception.

  2. Trust me, I have weasled my way out by saying, Sometimes mamas say that, but it comes back to bite me…So I try again…and again, and again, and again.

  3. God works wonders in molding and shaping us through our children, doesn't He? I LOVE that whole last paragraph, btw… What HOPE you've spoken through it!!

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