The Days Get Dark

This is Mental Illness Awareness Week. And as you may know by now, I struggle with some mental illness concerns. Depression and I are good friends.

I realized today that at the end of this month we are coming up on the two year anniversary of my first hospital stay, when it became apparent I needed more help than I could quickly get “on the outside.” I swore then it would be my only hospital stay for such issues, but life has not worked out that way; there have been two more just this year.

I hate those hospital stays. Hate them. Like you will never know. But they keep me safe when the depression gets too intense and the days get too dark.

This last time, I drove myself to the hospital. It had been a rough week. I had actually been to the emergency room earlier in the week but was deemed okay to go home. Two days later, the day was sooooo dark, I knew I would only be safe in the hospital.

It is hard to be there, but I am learning to at least be proud of myself for getting the help I need when I need it.

I not only go to the hospital when I need to, I go weekly to see the doctor for medication checks and therapy.

It doesn’t keep all the darkness away but the current medication regime seems to be enough to help me get through most days without too much trouble.

Because I got help. I asked when I needed it. Even though I was hurting, I valued my life. I valued the life of those around me.

If you are struggling and need to get help, reach out. Ask for help.

1-800-273-TALK

18 Responses to The Days Get Dark

  1. I’m so glad you are getting the help you need, and that you recognize what help you need and when. The world is a much better place with you in it than it would be without you.

  2. Proud of you for seeking help when you need it most. Your life absolutely has value. Your family loves and needs you, and so do we. Keep up the fight Charity!

  3. Keep going, Charity. You’re working so hard and you’re winning. So proud of you for asking for help and also for sharing your story.

  4. So proud of you for knowing yourself well and getting the help you need. You’re fighting hard and doing this! *hugs*

  5. You’re one of the bravest people I know. That is all xoxo

  6. Gr8 reminder to ppl to reach out for help. It must be so hard to think back on a hospital stay, but it helped you get well. You are strong!

    • It is hard Kathy to think back on the stays. My stomach ties up in knots. I actually tried to write about this about a month ago for suicide awareness, but it wouldn’t come. I guess now was it’s time to be written.

  7. Hi Charity – I’m so sorry you had to go through that. Having with partial care for three years, those institutions are scary places. Be well.

  8. Today is my appointment with my doctor. I try desperately to stay out so he can be the one who treats me. I will fight for my girls.

  9. So proud of you for sharing this. So sorry that you even have to go through this & I can tell by your posts how hard you fight. You seem so strong & never stop fighting!

  10. Such a brave and powerful story, Charity. So proud that you are reaching out for the help you need. Hugs.

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