In the In Between

Last Friday I sent out a clarion call via a Facebook Group.

I could feel the pressure building in my head and chest; not from a cold, but from hypomania.  The thoughts were starting to push harder against the constraints of my mind.  They were moving quickly and relentlessly.  One thought after another.

I sent out that call for helping, needing people to hear me, needing people to know where I was and where I might be headed.

They heard, they responded, they comforted.

I went to sleep thinking maybe the medications could stop the train like it has other times.  It was not to be.

I woke up testing my mind.  Thoughts.  Lots of thoughts.  Feelings.  Lots of feelings.

The energy wasn’t uncontrollable.  I didn’t have to be moving, but I had to be doing…I read a book, I planned, I thought, all quickly.

When I had some space, I cleaned, and exercised, quickly.

Sunday, I talked too much, I was too animated.  That night I was a laminating and cutting fool as I prepared for our homeschooling week.  (Have you ever wondered what a hypomania homeschool week looks like?  It is very hands on.  Lots of stuff to do.  Lots of stuff organized to be done.)

Monday dawned with beautiful spring weather, which only fed the fun.  The nice weather also helped bring some good balance–once school was done I sent the girls out to play and was left to my own devices.

Lots of thinking.  Lots of eating.

Now, life has tempered.  I am in a comfortable place. I am taking from the hypomania what I appreciated, extra reading and hands-on school activities, and leaving behind the over talking and the over thinking.

And it’s good.  It’s pleasant.  It’s comfortable.

Survive til you Thrive!

One Response to In the In Between

  1. So glad you reached out and talked. Sending you lots of love.

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