Dear Lighthouse Lady

Dear Lighthouse Lady,

You are very friendly.  I was surprised at how quickly you started up a conversation as we stood at the Lighthouse I had just toured with Caitlyn and Patrice, and was now waiting for my hubby to finish his ascent and descent.

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It was very pleasant to hear where you were from, why you were at the Lighthouse and who you were waiting to see come down.

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You should have stopped there.  But you didn’t, did you?

I assumed when you asked if the three girls playing in front of us were mine, that you would say the obligatory, “Oh how cute!”  But, not you!

“Do you want me to pray for you?”  Uh.  I know what prayer is, but whose first question, after finding out the kids are mine, says that?!

More words come out of your mouth.

“I had two daughters.  They are hard.  Boys start out hard, but they get easy.  Girls stay hard.  I had two daughters.  It was torture!”

I stand there nodding like an idiot, thinking, what woman?  What kind of thing is that to say?  I feel bad for your daughters!!!!

And you said all of this right in front of my girls.

I smile and nod and scurry away.

Your words are nice enough to stick with me as we play on the beach.

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After thinking about your harsh words for a while, I call Caitlyn and Sue over.  “Girls, remember that lady by the Lighthouse?  And how she said some mean things about having daughters?  I know you saw me nod and smile, but it was not because I agreed with her.  It was out of politeness.  But, I want you girls to know she is wrong.  Having daughters is not torture.  I am so blessed and honored that God gave me you three girls to raise.”  There was hugging and off they went to play in the water.

Now, m’am, I am not in anyway a Pollyanna.  I am more than aware there are challenges to having three girls. The first?  Only one bathroom for our family of 5. Or, any kids at all.  I am very well aware that I will have three teenage girls all at the same time.  But, that does not make my life torture.  Not at all.  I am blessed.  I am honored to have my girls.

Dear Lighthouse Lady. I hope by some miracle you are able to have a good relationship for your girls today.  I pray they have matured to love and honor you.

In the meantime, Dear Lighthouse Lady, I’d appreciate if you and I never cross paths again.


A Proud Mama of 3 Girls

(that picture that looks like it is just a lighthouse?  My hubby is up there waving.  I climbed that thing, but it was torture.  I abhor spiral staircases and heights don’t make me giggle.  Of course, hubby was up in no time, and stayed outside chatting the lighthouse keeper for an eon.  Sigh)


Survive til you Thrive!

5 Responses to Dear Lighthouse Lady

  1. People like this really bother me too. Especially now that i’m going to be a mom to 2 boys. Something I never pictured for myself. When I say we are having a 2nd I either get a look of excitement “boys are so fun” or “Oh…..”. A few have even asked me if I feel like i’m missing out on having a girl…umm yes (thanks for the reminder and jab at my feelings) I do sometimes, but it doesn’t mean I love my boys any less and they are amazing and wonderful and challenging sometimes just like girls are/will be. Until I became a mom, I had no idea how much of a blessing children were regardless of gender – that part doesn’t matter. The Lighthouse lady was out of line, sorry the girls over heard her.

  2. Good grief! Some people can be so thoughtless in their choice of words. Your three girls are amazing and so are you! 🙂 God blessed those girls with such a great mom. Not a perfect mom, but perfect for them.

    Where are you guys at here? I want to see all the lighthouses in MI eventually. 🙂

  3. Ugh, those comments make me bristle. You girls are sweet, smart and kind, just like their fantastic mama.

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