I Want to be Eloquent

But I don’t think that is going to happen tonight.  Things are hard.  Really, really hard.  I had hoped I was just looking at a blip, but instead I am finding this to be a deep descent into darkness, requiring extra medications, extra help from friends, extra boundaries, extra love.

I need all these things when I deserve them least.  I am not very lovable right now.  I am very self absorbed and needy.  I don’t have a lot to give–just my fear and darkness.

I am taking extra as needed medication to get through each day which is making me very lifeless, quite expressionlist.  It is all very frustrating, but it is where I am.

Survive til you Thrive!

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