All to the Glory of God–that is why I blog and share my story so openly. I want others to know it is possible to live and parent well with mental illness. This, by necessity, causes my posts to be brutally honest, and that is not always pretty.
I have always endeavored to live by the verse 2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
Depression is like other illnesses; the longer it goes on, the worse the symptoms are. There are lots of twists and turns when it goes on for a long time. For example, when this last depression started, it was like my others in that I fought it with exercise and movement. Unlike many other people dealing with depression, I didn’t sleep more, if anything I slept less. I didn’t move less, I moved more, I struggled to stop. But, as it continued, the depression wore me down, until I found myself hating the thought of the exercise, and especially the energy it would take from me. I slept more and more as my brain was less and less capable of doing things I once did with ease.
But then my new medication started to work, and layer by layer the depression began to fall away. I found myself setting aside some activities that I had clung to during the depression and I began picking up things I had lost in the darkness.
I started with walking. A bit at a time. Outside. And then back on the treadmill for miles at a time. I felt myself reclaiming me…bit by bit.
But there was one activity I still hadn’t tackled–my beloved exercise PiYo. I kept it at arms length for reasons I can’t explain…until Sunday. I found myself reaching out my my friend who has encouraged me and taught me so much about exercise. We decided to restart the program Monday (yesterday) and we did!!!
And I started singing this.Survive til you Thrive!