Grief By Surprise

I was minding my own business today.  Really, I was.  And a simple status update brought me up short.

A friend posted a fun list of questions about how well does an adult daughter know her dad.  It would seem she knows hers well.  The first question asked, “if you dad is sitting in front of the tv, what is he watching?”  One of her answers was YouTube.

It got me to thinking, what would my dad be watching…well, not much.  He wasn’t much to watch tv.  He was a workaholic so about all he did in front of the tv was either sleep or fall asleep just before the weather on the 11 o’clock news…and wake up as soon as the weather was done.

I think his favorite feature on a smartphone would have been looking up the weather or watching repair videos on YouTube.  But alas, his method for looking up repair procedures was the old Chilton Books (do they even still make those?).  I remember when it was time for me to learn how to fix my brakes on my 1982 Buick Skylark…I got my first foray into Chilton Books.

(It would appear the following video is as close as YouTube could get me–it seems most of the videos only get you back to about 1999–now I feel old)

 

Yes, I think he would have loved YouTube, but he died before it was created.  He died July 7, 2004 and YouTube was created February 14, 2005.  They would have been a match made in heaven.

He loved this song and would have loved looking it up to see who was getting the words right!

 

And suddenly, here I am sitting with grief.  Surprised to be wrapped up in thoughts of my dad.  Who he was, who I was, who I am now.  Who my husband is, who my children are.  Who he never met, what he is missing.

I am not overtaken by uncontrollable grief, but there is sadness and a heaviness.

 

Survive til you Thrive!

One Response to Grief By Surprise

  1. My dad just learned how to turn on the computer and I am amazed by that. Good lord if he ever found my blog…
    I think this memory of your father is charming – I can picture the both of you getting ready to learn all about breaks.
    Hell, I can’t even get the damn gas cap off my car half the time *insert embarrass face*

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