Monthly Archives: November 2017

Not a Runner’s Blog

I have a race tomorrow.  My first race since the half marathon in September.  Tomorrow’s race is a 5k–3.1 miles.  The distance is not a worry at all, and yet, I still have nerves.

Will I get up in time?  Will I find where they want me to park?  Will I remember my shoes?  Weird angst.

I’ve had some frustration all day.  I don’t know which came first, the all day nerves, or the running a race tomorrow nerves.


Here I am again, going on about running.  While asserting this is not a runner’s blog.  It’s not…I just so happens that running is the way I deal with most of life.

I have this thing I do in life where I see something, perceive that it is a good idea, take the leap, and then freak out about it.

Over and over and over and over again.

And here I am in freak out zone again.

Not really about the zoo race.  I don’t think.  Though my nerves are pretty wound up about that.  It is more about various projects I have going on.

I am actually done Christmas shopping for my girls.  Earliest ever!!  But I have taken on helping another family put together a Christmas for their family.  I sort of have things organized but I don’t trust the organization I have done, so I fret.  A lot.  Like feel like I can’t breathe fret.  Sit in my car trembling fret.  I don’t want to let my friend down and disappoint her kids.  It just has to work out.

Yeah, more than a little stressed.

In all of this I am trying to ignore the fact that my second born is turning 10 Tuesday.  She is such a little peanut.  She’s my little girl that yearns to be so big, so independent, and yet just wants time to be hugged and loved by mommy.

I had decided yesterday there was nothing worth getting up for on Black Friday.  And then a little voice asked from the back of the car, “Mommy, where are you going for Black Friday?  I think it would be so fun.”  She was so eager, I found myself checking ads again and setting my alarm for 5:15 this morning.  I half expected her to ignore me when I came down to wake her up, but no, she pretty much bounced up, wide awake.

So out we headed.  We purchased a few items at our first stop, a few more at our second stop, then a yummy treat, a few more items at our third store, and one more yummy treat.  During that second treat stop I was making an on-line purchase and was pretty intent on what I was doing, next thing I know, she is on my side of the table cuddled up next to me.  And I was reminded how important this one-on-one time is to my middle child…as I listened to her plan our Black Friday trip for next year!

No stores kept in the black from our little purchases, but we made a memory and that’s, as they say, priceless.  Oh my gosh you guys, that line I just wrote sounds so cheesy, but there are tears in my eyes when I think about how much this morning meant to my little peanut and I.  And how I almost missed it.

You guys, I don’t know how to sort it all out.  So I guess I am here writing it out trying to understand  my emotions and why I get so dang wrapped up in certain thoughts, why I can’t just shrug them off.


So there you go, a glimpse into how my brain is working, or not working, as of late.  I’d talk about the really cool fact that I signed up for my 2nd half marathon, but I better not, since this isn’t a runner’s blog.  I’ll just sit here amazed that I will run my SECOND half marathon a week after I turn 43. Nope, I won’t mention that.


Thanksgiving is coming up.

Fifteen years ago, on Thanksgiving I met my future husband’s family for the first time.  I had just gotten out of the hospital from another round of steroids to treat the Multiple Sclerosis.  My face was extra round from the mediation.  My body was weak and my sleep was messed up.

I was in no shape to meet anybody,  but thanks to my mom making the trip down and helping in so many ways, I arrived at my future sister-in-laws, dressed, upright, and bearing a homemade apple pie.

Multiple Sclerosis (MS) is a jerk.  It makes life unpredictable and hard.  The illness takes abilities and strengths.  It cuts you off from people.

I am ever so thankful that a few years after that first Thanksgiving, the MS went into remission.  And has stayed there for 12 years.

Unfortunately, that health challenge got replaced with Bipolar Disorder 7 years ago.  And the Bipolar is a jerk.  It is.  But you know what, I think I prefer it over the MS.

I made a mistake with my medication yesterday and it caused a day that felt like the MS (at least I think that is what happened).  And it was the pits.  I dropped something out in public and fell in front of my daughter when I tried to pick it up.  I was so weak I had to lean against things to sit up.  And oh how I needed to sleep.

It was the pits.  And it was scary.  And I hated it.

Today I feel better.  Not perfect, but better.  I may approach the doctor about changing this med and I put my meds in a granny pill sorter so I can’t make that mistake again.

But it reminded me, I prefer dealing with the Bipolar Disorder over the MS.

Writing MoJo

So every November there is a challenge to write every day, whether that is in completing a novel or blogging every day.  I have decided to try to blog every day in November.

And my mind is blank.

I had a post in mind, even written in my mind but now it is gone.

I am not one to write much about current events.  I’m actually in good shape concerning my mental health.  I haven’t been running much.  I seem to have lost my running mojo and my writing mojo.


Life is incredibly good.  And busy.  So very busy.

I have three kids, each in their own activities.  I am trying to get back to running.  I am trying to lose a number of pounds by tracking my calories.  My house needs a lot of TLC and cleaning.  I recently got frustrated with my lack of real cooking so have been attempting to make at least one meal per week from scratch.  I have dreams of getting all loads of laundry into the dryer before they have to be rewashed…but let’s not get crazy here folks.


Tonight’s dinner was pot roast


Running my first half marathon

Patrice is amazingly strong in gymnastics

Caitlyn is totally into the rock painting craze

Decked out in my Candy Corn shirt

Second year of cross country

Learning how to make kuba with new friends

Hanging out at a corn maze for a friends birthday shindig

And Sue is in A Christmas Carol so rehearsals are ramping up.  In between we do our schooling, church activities, and spent time with friends!!

Life is never dull moment around here!


It’s All in Fun

An hour and a half is all it took us to get all that loot (and you aren’t seeing Caitlyn’s hall).  It was fun.  But I am not sure how my oldest feels about it.  She went door-to-door but she seemed uncomfortable.  Candy is good, but I wouldn’t be surprised if next year she decides it is not worth it.  It is interesting.   You could see she was uncomfortable most of the evening, but Sue, just a year younger was all about ringing bells, knocking on doors and saying trick or treat.  Two little girls, so very different.