Monthly Archives: August 2017

Another Glimpse

Posted on August 22, 2017 | Leave a comment

I don’t think this is the first time, but I thought a glimpse into the hypomania side of bipolar disorder might be an okay idea today.

But first, check out this cute.

My girls are so beautiful and I am so proud of them. They keep me moving literally, mentally, and emotionally.

And lately, I have been moving…non-stop. It started with just busyness. Sue was finishing up practices and launching into performances for Seussical. It was phenomenal.

But it’s done–thing is, I can’t stop keep moving. Yes, life is busy, but I should be capable of slowing down, of stopping. I’m not. Having open time fills me with overwhelming panic and dread, like everything is going to fall apart if I stop for one single minute.

On the upside, there is always a lot to be done. Even hypomania can’t get me on top of all of it, but I am using it as much as possible.

Today included planning and organizing for the upcoming school year, laundry, and a million other little things.

This has been going on for weeks, which is not normal for me, and my thinking is starting to get much harder to control, my anger at things is out of proportion, I am over thinking EVERYTHING, so on and so forth.

Monday, it was time to call the doctor, so I did. He upped a med and I am headed to his office tomorrow.

I know it will get sorted out. Hypomania has always been a strange bedfellow for me, but one that can be helped. I know help is coming.

Looking For A Way To Help?

Posted on August 16, 2017 | Leave a comment

Every day we are bombarded with what is wrong with America and the world. We see people being cruel and downright evil to one another. And so often we are left confused, not knowing what to do to help.

I feel that way every.single.day.

I pray.

I teach my girls right from wrong.

I smile at those I pass in my day.

And sometimes God plops an opportunity to be hands-on right in my lap.

This was a recent experience. I agreed to help with a family new to America. I thought I would help a tiny bit and that would be that. What I found was a new friend. Someone who blesses my life every day. The joy she and her family bring me makes me want to help them in any way possible.

But I can’t do it all alone. Due to horrible things happening around the world, people are being forced to leave their homeland and find a new country in order to be safe. There is my dear friend, her family, and many more families coming to America. America is better for having these new families here.

But getting started in a new country is expensive. Housing. Transportation. Utilities. Food. Clothing. Furniture. School supplies.

That last one is where I would like to give you an opportunity to come alongside eight families I know who are making their way in a new land. I have started an Amazon wish list (New American Friends) with some of the basics needed for school. This list is just the beginning. I have started with a wish of 8 each, but that would likely only help 2 families–in some instances, only 1 family. These kids are walking into new schools in a new language. Wouldn’t it be great to get each of them at least the items the school asks them to bring at the beginning of the year?

None of us LIKES to need help, but we all do sometimes, don’t we? Sometimes we need help paying a bill. Sometimes we need a listening ear. Sometimes we need help making a decision. Sometimes we even need someone to take care of us. Regardless, we all need help sometimes.

Sometimes, we can help others. Sometimes we can speak up for others, sometimes we can hold a hand. Sometimes we can buy school supplies.

Please help me stand with these New American Families (link here) and help them help their kids get school supplies.

I, they, we, would be ever so grateful.

Parting Ways

Posted on August 2, 2017 | Leave a comment

All to the Glory of God–that is why I blog and share my story so openly. I want others to know it is possible to live and parent well with mental illness. This, by necessity, causes my posts to be brutally honest, and that is not always pretty.

I have always endeavored to live by the verse 2 Corinthians 12:9

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

This is not me. This is not her. It used to be me. It’s never been her.

I spent several years in and out of this wheelchair due to Multiple Sclerosis (MS). I have learned to walk three times in my life…and that last time seems to have been the charm as the MS has been in remission since before that almost 11-year-old up there was even in the womb and I have gone from using a wheelchair to running 5ks, 10ks, and soon a half marathon!

So, today, that wheelchair and I are parting ways. Permanently. I am taking back my attic space and you, dear wheeled chariot, are going back to work.

Let me explain.

My family and I felt the call a few months ago to begin helping refugees who are fleeing horrible, horrible situations. These new Americans have been vetted by every level of government and have waited through years of paperwork to get here. They are here to be safe, to be free.

I didn’t know what to expect the first time I visited Mary (name changed) but what I found, was a friend–one of my most favorite people in the world. I like to think I help her and her family, but what I know, is I love being around her and her family. It brings me much joy and happiness.

Then there was an e-mail from a local agency asking me to help another family. I was scared to say yes, but thanks to google translate all went well and I got them to their doctor appointment. One of the family members Helen (name changed) was in a wheelchair. A really old beat up wheelchair. In this family, I saw loneliness. I have known loneliness many times in my life and seeing it so naked before me, I wanted to run…but my heart was drawn to them.

Then, a few weeks later, the agency sent out a list of things needed for a family. We had two of those items. A sofa and a vacuum a neighbor had given us when they moved. I ignored the wheelchair on that list. Yes, I have one…but I can’t give it away…what if?

Last night, we went to deliver the sofa and the vacuum. And who greeted us, but Stephen (name changed), Helen’s brother. They were the ones moving into an apartment needing these items. And there was Helen, sitting on the floor, needing a wheelchair. And there was me, fresh from running 5 miles, owning a wheelchair. But, what if…

What if what?

I called hubby to talk to him about it. He was all for passing along the chair…and she is not much bigger than I…so even though it was made for me…it seems like it is time for it to be made for her.

So today, I put Sue to work cleaning a decade plus of grime off my chair. Tonight I am going to drop it off to Helen. Friday I am going to attempt another 10 mile run.

All by the grace of God.