Category Archives: baby 3

Days of Pregnancy

I have entered that odd time in pregnancy, where the calendar says the time of baby’s arrival is coming very soon, but your mind and heart feel like it will be forever!!!!  Truth be told, baby will arrive no later than August 14 (42 weeks).  And that seems like a crazy amount of time.  A friend of mine had her baby recently.  Our last little ones were born within days of each other.  With the arrival of her beautiful girl, I am more antsy to find out if we are welcoming a third little girl or a boy to our clan.

Normally I hit the antsy time about 5 weeks before baby is born.  This time I got a hidden blessing.  About 5 1/2 weeks before my due date, we found out baby had moved out of the birth position, into a breech presentation.  That took away all my ansty-ness.  I did not want this baby to come one second before it got it’s little self into the proper position for birth. Nope, stay right there little one!!!

After the reveation of baby’s position, I spent two weeks going to chiropractors for adjustments called the Webster Technique.  I also spent hours on my hands and knees and in a swimming pool diving to the bottom and doing hand stands.  I did not even know I could do hand stands in a pool, but determination will get you far.  I played music to the bottom of my belly and several other ideas I researched.

I begged many for prayers, cried out to God and cried in general.  I know there are worse things than a breech birth.  I do.  I have watched several friends walk through immeasurably worse.  But in our lives, this was the struggle we were living.

Baby stayed breech.  So a manual turning of baby was scheduled.  Hubby and I were a bit concerned the position could be caused by the cord being wrapped or some other issue, so we decided to have a full ultrasound done before the turning at 37 1/2 weeks.  We got in to the ultrasound, and almost immediately, the tech asked, “why are you here?”  I told her because after a month of being in great position baby had turned breech and they were getting ready to turn baby in two days.  She said, “well baby’s not breech.”  I kept asking, are  you serious, are you sure, hubby did you hear that?  I started to cry.  She finally said, “that’s a good thing, right?”  Yes, oh yes, you have no idea how much time I have spent in the pool, at chiropractors, on my hands and knees.  Yes!!!!  I asked her several times through the scan, is baby still head down.  “Yes, but this baby sure moves a lot!”

My midwife had told me as soon as baby got into a good position, she would have me put on a belly brace and not take it off.  I didn’t even sit down between the scan and e-mailing my midwife to find out how to put the brace on.

That was Tuesday, my next midwife appointment was Friday.  Thankfully hubby had taken me seriously when after one of the appointments where baby was still breech I had sobbed to him that he had to come to my appointments because I couldn’t bear to face them alone anymore.  So, he left work early and came to my appointment.

At the beginning of the appointment, my midwife found the heartbeat at the bottom of my belly.  Then she said, do you want me to do a quick scan just to make sure baby is head down.  Yes, let’s do that.  And apparently in the time she got the ultrasound machine, baby moved again, and went breech.

I sobbed.  My midwife just hugged me and agreed this was a horrible situation and talked about our options if baby continued to be in unstable lie, meaning moving in and out of birth position.  She then told me to call the chiropractor right away to see if I could get in that day.  And we scheduled the manual turning for Monday morning.

So I went to the chiropractor that night and Sunday morning.  And Monday morning before the scheduled turning.  As I walked into the chiropractor appointment, I got some horrible cramps.  They doubled me over, but then were gone.

We got to the hospital.  The nurse noticed I seemed very upset.  I told her I did not want the turning, I did not want all the meds they were going to pump into me, and as a consequence the baby, and I hated the whole deal.  She offered to send in the midwife on duty to talk to me.

We talked for a while, about how we did not have to use all the medications, how I could tell them to stop at any time, and that I still had options.  She told us a story about a woman she attended where the baby was breech up until 42 weeks, turned on it’s own at church, and was born the next day weighing 13 lbs, so that in her mind, there is never really a time where baby is too big to turn!  That was reassuring, though I would like to avoid a 13 pound baby!!!  She tried to palpate, check baby’s position with her hands on my belly, but was unable to do so.  So time for another ultrasound.  And there was baby, just as head down as could be!!! 

Yup, another turning procedure that wasn’t.  I put the brace back on.

The next day was my regular appointment with a midwife, not mine.  I refused an ultrasound, but the heartbeat was low in my belly, meaning the head was down where it belonged.

And a week later, at 39 weeks 1 day, head was still down where it belonged, so my midwife told me I could quit wearing the brace.

Since then, I have been relieved to not wear the brace, thanking the Lord for answered prayers and asking Him to keep baby in the proper position and to get labor started!!!!!!!!!

I must admit there is still a roller coaster in my emotions and heart.  Sometimes the baby does not move much at all and I freak out.  Other times, baby moves like crazy and I freak out, what if it turns out of position again????

Here I am, one day before my due date, 2 days before my oldest birthday, wondering and waiting.

I know the Lord is faithful, and without Him, the prayers of so many and the support of my great midwife and chiropractor, I know I would be going nuts…I am close enough as it is.  Thank you Lord for not making me walk this alone!!!!

Should be…

I should be doing so many things, because, if you notice my ticker on the bottom, baby 3 is due in 7 days.  I did not quite go to 40 weeks with either of my girls, so you would think I would be doing those other things, but nope, I am blogging.  Hmmmm…

What should I be doing:

Finishing sewing a valance for the girls new princess room
Getting the carseat washed up
Cleaning my house
Resting for the big day
Taking my blood pressure because I got a massive headache while outside with the girls

What I have done:

Put a princess dress on Caitlyn
Disappointed Sue by not being able to find her a princess dress to her liking

Taken girls outside to play for a few minutes
Yup, that is Sue in a winter hat.
Then made Sue’s day by bringing them inside and broke Caitlyn’s heart for doing the same.  But this majorly preggo mama had to go potty!!!!!
We have managed to have some other fun this summer. 
We recently went blueberry picking:
Which Caitlyn enjoyed more than Sue
And a few weeks before that, for 4th of July, we went to a local city park that has a lake and a picnic area
(Please note, it appears all dates on pictures are wrong…crazy…or maybe these last pictures are from a trip daddy did with them…I don’t know…)
There have been other doings, some of which have stretched us more than we desire, but those are for another day…
What have you done with your summer “vacation?”

On this day 6 years ago

I remember being in a meeting at work on a Wednesday morning.  I did not have my cell phone with me.  And looking back, that is probably a good thing.  When I got back to my desk, there were messages on both my desk and cell phone from my sister.

And I honestly could not believe her message.  6 years later I still struggle to believe it.  Our dad had died that morning in a single car crash.

I had just talked to him 2 weeks before.  It was a great conversation.  The best in years.  Our relationship had been strained for a few years.  That conversation seemed to bring an amazing amount of healing.  And it wasn’t really about much.  I had called to tell him I still thought he was crazy for all those years of going to work so early, but I had joined him.  Most mornings found me at work at 6 am.  And he hadn’t changed, he was on his way to work, so was I, and it was not yet 6 am.  I also told him about my new engagement.  My now husband, had just proposed.

And here I was 2 weeks later hearing he was gone.  Gone.  I was so shocked I asked my sister if she was sure, maybe there was a mistake.  Sadly, there was no mistake.  The beginning of our restoration was done.

I called my fiance.  He came and got me from work.  I thought I would be back in a few hours after I had a chance to calm down.  I was clueless about the pain that would start to wash over me again and again.

The next days were agony.  There would be no more healing between us.  He would not be at my upcoming wedding.  It was all gone.  And I was left with tears and disappointment.  And over time, a new understanding of what grief is.  I had lost other family members, but this was different, my dad was instantly gone.  He wasn’t old, he hadn’t lived his life completely, to my mind, but he was gone.

Over the next months of planning the wedding, I missed him so much.  But I was given a gift.  I dreamt of my dad many, many times.  I got to introduce him to my pastor and several people in my life and wedding.  In one dream he even said, “I will be with you until your husband takes over.”  And he was, the dreams continued until the wedding.

In these 6 years, my hubby and I have had a great marriage, and have so far, added two beautiful little girls to our family.  And are awaiting the arrival of our third child.  And with each positive pregnancy test all the way til the birth I mourn he will not meet my children.  I have taken my wedding pictures and wedding ring to his grave to “show” him, as well as each of my children.  And will do so again in a couple months.  And I will grieve.

I think part of me will always grieve, but recently, my aunt, his sister, told me to embrace the life I have with my family, with my girls, and enjoy our life.  And we will.  We will live each day, rejoicing in the gift of life, refusing to allow things to come between us to leave us with regrets. 

I hope my sister doesn’t mind, but here is a picture I poached from her facebook albums. 

Daddy, I love you.  Thank you for teaching me to tie my shoes, and my alphabet and how to ride a bike and how to change the oil in my car and to replace the brakes on that same car.  The list could go on and on.  You are one of a kind.  From the craziness of the handlebar mustache you sported for a while, to the odd little quotes you said that people termed “Verlynisms”, because they were something only you would say.  I love you.  And am so thankful for that last conversation.  I am not sure I could have survived the grief without that healing, restorative conversation.  Thank you Lord for your mercies in giving me that conversation and the months of dreams leading up to my wedding. 

Daddy, we’ll be up to “see” you soon and introduce your 9th grandchild!  And in the meantime, I will enjoy things that bring memories of you.  I love you.

Random Baby 3 Thoughts

I had my 32 week appointment yesterday.  I just wanted to hear baby was head down and positioned well.  Praise the Lord, that is exactly what I heard.  Then I forgot to mention I was getting the pregnancy itchies.  Why remember to ask your questions while there…oh yeah, because a few hours later the itching will be so bad you truly can not function at work.  I was debating whether to e-mail my midwife or just tough it out…and her office called to give me test results from the thyroid test and I was able to ask!!  And the answer was yes, I could use benadryl cream.  Thank you Lord for that perfectly timed phone call!!!!

Then while I am at the store, wondering what else I can do, my midwife e-mails me and tells me I can also take benadryl tablets and to let her know if I don’t get relief.  I once again was praising the Lord for her timing.  And for the blessing she is to me.

The benadryl tablets help a little bit…not completely but I can function.  Except for being so sleepy, but honestly that is better than being so itchy.  You are probably thinking it is my growing belly that is itching, nope, everywhere but my belly.  I had this with Caitlyn.  I remember laying in bed in tears because I itched so bad.  I never thought to ask if there was something more than lotion I could try.

This baby is very, very active.  Sometimes to the point of pleasant discomfort.  Owie from the force of it, but it brings so much joy to see him or her movin’ and groovin’.  And a joy I never had with the girls, I can SEE the baby moving my belly.  I don’t just feel the kicks, I see them.  And can even tell sometimes that it is a foot.  That is soooo cool and such a gift from the Lord. 

Thank you Lord for babies and for just added gifts.  I often whine about parts of pregnancy, but then you give the gift of movement from my little one.  Thank you!!!!

New month Not Me Monday

Mckmama- Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I was not, at first, really jealous that hubby had last Friday off and got to take the girls to the beach while I had to work.  No, I know I get more time with them, so I would not begrudge him the time he gets.  I did not then change my mind and hope they were all still at the beach when I finally got home so I could just take a nap. (I did not get my wish, they were home, no nap for me).

We then did not spend all weekend working on various projects because I decided to start nesting.  No, I would never keep reminding hubby of all we had to do in the 2 months before baby comes.  I  know we need a break and rest and time as a family.

I am not making myself crazy with the nesting.  No, I know we will get done what needs to be done.  Oh wait, I am not still freaking out at how much there is to be done.  I am not worried about getting the girls bunkbeds built (hubby’s project) and getting the wallpaper border up and window valances made.  No, I know we will get it all done…

What did you not do over the holiday weekend?

Pregnancy random thoughts

Not a whole lot to say, but hey…I can not believe I am under 10 weeks from my due date with baby 3!  Yay!  And apparently baby decided to celebrate yesterday with tons and tons of activity.  Honestly, I think the baby only stopped moving about an hour all day long.  This of course irritated my fussy uterus.  And the braxton hicks contractions started.  Wowzers.  I mean, wowzers. 

I started the day not feeling great, ended the day remembering how amazingly strong braxton hicks contractions can be.  I would like to talk to those pregnancy book writers whugh o say braxton hicks contractions are not painful.  They are either men or it has been a long time since they were pregnant.  Actually, it doesn’t even have to be a long time.  I swear there is a hormone released at various stages of labor and pregnancy to help you forget the challenges. 

You have to forget.  First, you have to forget the angst of trying to get pregnant or you will never subject yourself to that stressful waiting game.  Then you have to forget how bad morning sickness and first trimester exhaustion can be.  Next you have to forget how the blissful period of second trimester is not exaclty perfect.  Then you have to forget the trauma of seeing your body change from the form you know to this blimp sized thing.  Oh and the contractions, the braxton hicks contractions and then the actual contractons.

And blssfully, you do forget!!!  The Lord is gracious, and you forget so you are more than willing to go through every step of it. 

You are willing to go through every ache and pain. Every emotional up and down.  Every mood swing that makes you feel nuts.  Through every braxton hicks contraction.  Every moment of low baby movement that makes you worry something has happened in utero. 

Does the forgetting happen in stages or does it happen all in one moment when you hold the baby?  When you give him or her their name?

I don’t know.  I really don’t.  But I know the Lord is gracious.  He knows pregnancy can hold lots of challenges and he provides a way for us to forget. 

Then again, maybe I do know.  I think it is the overwhelming love for your child.  I have friends who have adopted.  That process, I think, would have challenges that make some of pregnancy stuff, seem like a walk in the park.  But many of those same friends, decide to walk the walk again.  So, yes, it is the love for the child God has given you, no matter how He gives Him.

The Lord is gracious and good.  Thank you Lord for love.,  For making a way when we don’t see a way.

Caitlyn is top picture, Sue is bottom.

Not Me Not this weekend…

Mckmama- Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I did not sit inside on a glorious spring day to write blog posts.  Oh no, I am out living life, not writing about it.

I did not meet my husband at the door Friday afternoon and say, I have to go to the gym.  I have to get out of here now.  My kids were not driving me so nuts I had to count the minutes til I could get out of here.  No, I am aware they are 2 and 3 and sometimes will have days that are, well, challenging. 

I did not threaten not to come home after a baby shower I went to yesterday, sans kids, if they were still being, well, challenging.  I did not completely enjoy my time without them yesterday at the shower. 
I did not, while talking to a friend at the shower yesterday, get a kick from baby 3 so hard that I yelped.  Oh no, I know what a baby kicking feels like and I am not such a wimp it would cause me to interrupt someone.
I did not stretch my kid-free time yesterday by going to the store on my way home.  I also did not buy more strawberries at the store, since I have eaten all of the ones hubby bought me on Wednesday.  No, I am not tempted to live on strawberries.  Nope, I eat much more balanced than that.
I did not celebrate my birthday by having 3 diet cokes on Thursday.  I did not also stretch the three diet coke day into Friday…and Saturday.  Oh no, I would never do that.  I know the heartburn at any minute could get really bad…
I did not go running into the bathroom with the camera to take pictures of my dirt covered kids before they got in the tub, only to be disappointed they were already mostly in the bathtub.
I did not do any of that this last week(end).  Nope, not me…what did you not do this week?

Biggest or Smallest Winners!

I have had this blog rolling around in my head for a while.  Let me start off by saying no one asked my opinion on this matter and no one is paying me a single cent…

A few seasons back, my hubby and I discovered the tv show “Biggest Loser.”  Now normally, we are not much for “reality” tv.  But this one grabbed our attention and is now the only show we intentionally watch every week. 

Why?  Because in some ways it hits home.  We both carry a few extra pounds, and I am not talking about the current baby pounds…and need motivation and inspiration to do something about it.

I personally have found Biggest Loser to be very motivational.  I feel extremely guilty if I have not exercised and I am watching the show.  Last week, I didn’t make it to the gym due to working late, so I did step aerobics for 30 minutes while I watched the contestants.  Pre-baby, I jogged during the show.  Now, at 28 weeks pregnant, jogging doesn’t have as much appeal…

We love to watch the transformations.  We love to see people go from just barely able to keep up with a 1/2 mile walk on day one, to truly a different person by the final 6…

Yes, we are well aware they are in a situation most of us are not.  Most of us do not have 6 hours a day to workout, or personal trainers, or nutritionists or medical supervision or the opportunity to focus so completely on our physical condition.

And does it happen the contestants go back to their old habits and regain weight? Yes, for some it does.  For all I know, maybe a significant number do.  But there are at least a few who do not.  And for those people, the show truly has made a huge difference.

It also can make a difference for people not on the show.  The Pound for Pound challenge they have started has helped many people, it gives them a goal to work toward while helping someone else.  Last season, I signed up to lose 15 pounds during the pound for pound challenge.  I didn’t quite make goal.  I lost about 10 pounds, but losing it not only helped me, but food was donated to food banks due to my hard work.

Beyond that, my workplace has added a similar program where people can sign up to participate in a weight loss challenge and for every pound lost, the company will donate 25 cents to a food bank, which equals about 1 pound of food.  Again, it benefits many people, those who need to change their eating and those who need the food to eat.  It is a win-win situation!

And again, maybe not everyone keeps the weight they lose off, but a few do.  The show may not solve our obesity problem in America, but if it helps just a few, doesn’t that matter?  It sure does.  We have to start somewhere.  So tonight, like many other Tuesday’s, I will start by making sure I go to the gym before the show and if I am still full of energy, I’ll do a few extra minutes of step aerobics while watching.

Here is me the day I earned my 100 workout shirt at the gym.  I was very proud to have earned it and even more so to be working out while pregnant.  I was almost 16 weeks along in this photo.  At 28 weeks, I can no long fit in the shirt, but I have it for when I can!!!  And will be well on my way to earning my 200 workout shirt.  I did not workout during my first two pregnancies.  I am thrilled to still be going to the gym, even though the intensity of workouts isn’t quite there, I still am!

Braxton Hicks Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Check out my Braxton Hicks Not Me Monday thoughts as part of the fun.

I did not randomly realize I was crying while coping with braxton hicks contractions walking through the grocery store Thursday afternoon. No, I know that I contract early and often in my pregnancies. I did not again cry while having lots of contractions Friday night too. Again, I know for me this is normal. I was not completely overwhelmed by the thought of 3 more months of this on and off. No, I know pregnancy is a gift and I will cherish it. I was not minutes away from telling my hubby we had to go to the hospital to get the contractions checked out Friday night. No way, I am going to keep my promise to my husband to not freak out at every contraction, so I would never overreact already! I was not then so overwhelmed with relief when my midwife e-mailed me back late Friday night that I started to cry. No, I am much more calm, cool and collected than that! I did not then spend Saturday and Sunday afraid every twinge was the beginning of several more hours of contractions. Oh no.

Oh no, this is not going to be a very long 3 months until baby is safely here.

Me at 25 weeks 6 days.

The news today…

One of the “pleasures” of pregnancy is the gestational diabetes test.  Between week 24 and 29 you get to drink a glucose solution to see how your body reacts with insulin.

I passed, no problem when pregnant with Caitlyn.

I was surprised when I was pregnant with Sue when I failed the 1 hour glucose tolerance test and had to go for the three hour test.  And after drinking that nasty concoction, I was subjected to several hours of blood draws so they could see how my body responded to the glucose.  It turned out, one of the hours my body did not provide enough insulin to counteract the sugar in the appropriate time.  I then had to meet with a nurse to learn how to test my sugar levels and follow a special diet for the remainder of my pregnancy.

I was heartbroken.  I felt like my body had betrayed me and like I had let myself down.  My only risk factor was the extra weight I carried.  I was scared at what it meant for my baby and what it could mean for my future, as gestational sugar issues can be a precursor to type 2 diabetes.

I followed the diet, my baby was not large, I kept my sugar in check and all issues disappeared once Sue was born. 

Between Sue and this baby, I started jogging, going to the gym and lost not only the baby weight, but also an additional 15 pounds before I got pregnant again.  I still carried 10 extra pounds, but I had done my darndest.

And I have kept going to the gym and walking while pregnant.

Last week it was time to do the 1 hour sugar test for this baby.  My midwife and I had talked about my risk of sugar issues being raised because of having them with Sue, but that my one hope was I had lost all my baby weight plus some extra.  I wanted to hope I would not need to do the extra tests and diet, but I just wasn’t confident.

Today I e-mailed my midwife to see how it had turned out…and I passed the test!!!!!  I passed!!!!!  I do not have to do additional testing and that is a good sign for my future risk of diabetes…let me say it again, I PASSED!!!!!

All that hard work between babies and while pregnant has paid big dividends!!!!!  I cried, I was so excited, and sooooo motivated to continue exercising and making decent eating choices while pregnant. 

My wonderful midwife put it best…”Great Job.  Keep up the exercise.”