Category Archives: Life Lessons

My Brain is Kind of Empty

I have talked and thought about some really heavy stuff lately.  It’s good.  It really is.  I am healing, getting stronger.  I am going to come through this journey with postpartum depression and anxiety a whole, healthy person.  The Lord is using an excellent team of people to bring me into freedom.

In the meantime, life continues to be sweet and wonderful.

1.  We sent our new computer in for repairs and the company had it back to us within 4 days.  Fantasic service.  Except now I can’t get my camera card in the slot to download the pictures.

2.  Hubby and I were recently talking and I said, “I would love to have more kids.”  Caitlyn was listening in and yelled, “no you wouldn’t!”  Guess she hadn’t forgotten my short temper from that morning.

3.  Caitlyn loves exercise videos.  She asks me every night if we are going to do a video.  So tonight I thought we would try something different, “Sweatin’ to the Oldies”, she took one look at it, declared it not exercise and refused to do any of it.  As her Aunt says, “I guess she likes extreme exercise.”

4.  Patrice has been joining the girls and I in exercising.  A 17 month old doing push ups is as funny as you might imagine.  She lays down, puts her head and feet up and her little hands down.  I will get a good picture…

5.  Sue is bored.  I think that is why we are getting more whining, acting out and challenging us.  Shoot me some ideas on projects, crafts we can do with her.  I am not looking for us to entertain her all the time, but honest, she is a little bored.  She’s a smart cookie.  She needs more.

6.  And because my blog has been all words, not pictures, here are some cute shots 

Playing Whack-A-Mole with Grandma with two doggies

How do I spin this thing?

Here’s how you do it Patrice.

I like to use it THIS way!!!!


Linking up with Life Ever Since.

Check it out.

So Much Swirling in My Head

The last week has been kind of big.  Not in earth shattering changes, but in conversations that needed to happen, personal realizations and an understanding that I have a lot of work ahead of me.

Have you ever had a week like that, where you know you have changed.  And yet, the world around you just keeps going, moving.  And you can’t understand why no one else is feeling the same emotional earthquake as you?

This is one of those weeks.

And it is good.

I am not quite ready to share all that has shook my world, but here’s a bit:

1.  I am glad I am doing therapy along with medication.

2.  I think sorting things out, while uncomfortable, will make me more confident in my healing from depression.

3.  It is a valuable exercise in your marriage or close relationships to have the other person describe you, who you are, to you.  I was blessed beyond words to hear how my husband views me.  He sees a me that gives me so much hope for today and the future.  He sees a me that is capable of growing and reaching.  He sees a me that I can envision him wanting to stay married to.

4.  It is a hard comfort, but a comfort nonetheless, to spill some “truths” you know about yourself and have the hearer say, “I hear the depression talking.”  My first reaction was to take it as a brush off of how I am feeling, but then I thought, no, if these truths I know, aren’t true, I am going to walk in more wholeness and healing (some day).

5.  You never know, when you wake up, when a day is going to turn into one that involves some heavy thinking and conversations.

6.  It’s really good to hear that someone is seeing the effort you are putting forth in a challenging area of life.

7.  And, to not be too crazy serious, it is WONDERFUL to see muscle developing where you’ve never seen it previously.

I am linking up with

Life Ever Since.

Lessons in Helping Others

I was given the opportunity yesterday to volunteer at a local food help organization, Gleaners.  It was an amazing experience.  And it was heartbreaking.  I was looking at this food and realizing how much it would bless the people we were packing the boxes for, and mourning how picky our family and kids are about their food. 
1.  I felt guilty being at a food bank and being overweight, thinking how I would be going to the store to spend extra on food to help me loose weight.  I do need to lose weight, as pictures from the event proved, but it seems selfish to have gotten myself to this point.
2.  I was amazed at the generosity of people, organizations, and food corporations in America.  A heartfelt thank you to everyone.
3.  I was also amazed at some of the things people donated.  Half used boxes of stuffing mix, peanut butter and macaroni and cheese are not helpful.  Neither are water chestnuts.
4.  All items used in food boxes must have a nutrition label on them.
5.  Dried goods, spaghetti, oatmeal, noodles, are all great things to donate.  So are items that are good sources of protein, peanut butter, tuna fish, kidney beans, beef ravioli.  Breakfast foods are needed.  If you donate cake mix, please donate frosting as well, same with peanut butter and jelly.  They try very hard to have complimenting items in the box. 
6.  I can take my older girls to volunteer.  The coordinator has worked with kids as young as 20 months old.  You can drop in to volunteer any Saturday 9 to 2:30 starting in January.  You better believe we will be there!
7.  Getting involved and helping was a great learning experience and a lot of fun!
8.  I will find a way to make this a family tradition.
What have you learned lately?  Link up with Life Ever Since.

Life Lessons–Random Style

Here I am again trying to figure out what I learned this week…This week was kind of a blur of illness.  Well more than a few weeks.  It started with Caitlyn getting an ear infection.  Which apparently my body thought was fun, because I got one too.  Then while I was still on antibiotics for that I got something on my leg that swelled, got hot and bruised…turns out I had an allergic reaction to something that bit me.  Sigh.

Then came hubby and I’s anniversary weekend.  We went on Saturday, the day before our anniversary…good thing because Caitlyn woke up with pink eye the next morning.  Oh the horrible screaming she did when we put the drops in, then a few days later Sue started with the goopy eyes, and three days later, Patrice.  Just for kicks mommy and daddy got colds and finally, yup, today I woke up with the beginnings of pink eye.

So, I guess our life lessons are about colds.

1.  Sending your oldest to school introduces lots of new germs.

2.  She might not be the only one to get sick from all her “sharing.”

3.  Adults can get ear infections.

4.  Adults can get pink eye.

5.  Eye drops in little girls eyes cause such fits you would think they hurt.

6.  The drops do not hurt, they actually feel good.

7.  Cough syrup makes my head feel woozy.

8.  Being woozy is better than coughing like crazy.

9.  Having two sick parents in the house is no fun.

10.  My husband does not have a sister wife or a spare wife that we can call on for parenting when we are sick.

Those are my life lessons.  What are yours?

Tantrums and Life Lessons

I am reflecting on the last week with Life Lessons.  Come Join the Fun.

What did I learn this week?  Hmmmm….has it really been one of those weeks where I just survive…there’s got to be something…somewhere in this brain that wasn’t there before…

1.  This has been a week of temper tantrums from both Caitlyn and Sue.  Wowzers.  So this week has been a blur of screaming.

2.  But in sharing with my midwife about Caitlyn’s, she hit the nail on the head…Caitlyn is looking for our attention.  Since starting school she is away from family the most she ever has been. The last couple days I have been intentionally giving her attention before the fit and voila’, no fit.  Also found out, in passing, her best friend at school moved away and is not there anymore.  That might contribute to her stress.

3.  Sue, on the other hand, is just 3, almost 4.  I remember these were painful weeks last year with Caitlyn right before she turned 4.  So we are dealing with them, and biding our time.

4.  The new weapon in Sue’s arsenal during a fit, “you’re ugly, ugly, ugly.”  That kind of stung.  2 minutes later she was distracted by something and the fit ended quicker than it started.  Whew.

5.  My kids are hard taskmasters!  Caitlyn knows I gave up sweets.  And part of the reason is sugar overload makes me angry.  Now, if she sees me eating something I ought not, “don’t eat that, it’s sugar, it will make you angry!”  She’s right and has saved me from lots of cheating.  Let’s not tell her there is sugar in the strawberry lemonades I have fallen in love with and treat myself to sometimes.

6.  Running in the park is WONDERFUL.  I love it.  I am hoping to go tonight.  We’ll see…

7.  And now it is time for me to get myself ready and run off to work…

Update on Transitions and Life Lessons

This week has been good.  Full and busy, but I think the giving up diet coke has helped me overall.  I feel a lot better, more in control of my emotions.  I am looking forward to other changes to my diet, to see if I can get things even better.

1.  We are transitioning to new childcare, which has been wonderful.  Sue and Patrice love the new person we have.  I love being able to get Caitlyn out the door and me to work.  Much less stress.

2.  It requires us to clean the house daily, but we are keeping up with it.  And it is nice having a clean house. 

3.  Someone has slept really well the last two nights.  I am not talking about who.  I have slept decent.  I am really hoping for better sleep this weekend.

4.  I figured out what was wrong with our dishwasher.  I am feeling very proud of myself.

5.  One of my bosses at work paid me a big compliment.  That will get people far with me.  I will bust my butt for someone who says thank you or pays me a compliment.

6.  Drop off at school has been good this week.  Monday was Caitlyn’s first day in a new classroom, so they invited the parents to come in.  I did.  She cried.  Twice.  The rest of the week has been “dump and run.”  She waves as she runs to the door.  Wonderful!

7.  I heard, through twitter, that Hyland Teething Tablets are back on the market.  A friend found some and is mailing them to me.  Now I can quit hoarding my recalled ones and give Patrice the tablets to help with teeth.

8.  The relief they give kids was worth ignoring the recall.  I figured two kids had been fine on them, and they weren’t recalled for anything in them, it was because they weren’t uniform in how much was in each tablet, so I still used the ones left over from Sue.  And felt kind of sneaky about it, like I was breaking the rules.  Yeah, I’m a rebel.

9.  We went to the cider mill yesterday.  Glorious.  The donuts, the cider, the walk along the river on the tree lined path.  I’m very glad we went.

10.  And this picture just seems appropriate for linking with Life with Baby Donut.

Life Lessons and Blog Posts

Life With Baby Donut
I did not do anything as cool as Rach, who went to a Crybaby Matinee, but it was quite a week.

1.  We talked about triggers during #ppdchat on Monday.  It was well timed because this week was full of them for lots of us ppd mamas.

2.  I had a big fat anxiety attack on Tuesday but I managed to persevere and not give into the terror overwhelming me.

3.  Thursday I read a news article that I shouldn’t have and ended up losing it for a little bit.  Thank you to Lauren who called me and talked me down.

4.  Once I calmed, I wrote this post about getting help for postpartum depression and having a plan.  It got featured on as a Warrior Mom post.

5.  I also did a guest post over at Motherhood Unadorned about my parenting choices.

6.  I made a blueberry pie today.  That may not sound like much, but last year, when the postpartum anxiety was at it’s highest, I made a blueberry pie with my oldest.  It was a desperate attempt to survive a particularly painful day.  I cried a lot while we made that pie.  I was a little worried that making one today would flood me with too many memories, but it didn’t. It was just fun.

7.  All in all, this week was full of wins!

Won’t you come check out the fun of Life Lessons?

Life Lessons–Birthday Style

Life With Baby Donut

I am joining a different blog hop this week.  I love chatting with Rach on twitter and thought I would join in here.

This weeks life lessons:

1.  Reading must come with age, Caitlyn turned 5 this week.  Sue came running out of their room that morning and said, “Caitlyn, can you read now?”  Caitlyn said, “I don’t know, let’s check!”  She proceeded to go get a book and give it a try.

2.  Sue is the only one of my  kids not having a birthday this week.  She thinks this stinks.  But she is getting the hang of enjoying the fun.  Caitlyn’s birthday was Wednesday.  Thursday, Sue says, “I wish it were still your birthday.”  Caitlyn said, “don’t worry, soon I’ll turn 6!”  Oh my, we just finished counting down to 5.  And we still have Patrice’s birthday on Sunday!

3.  Patrice has slept through the night twice this week (shhh, don’t tell anybody).  That makes 5 times in her entire life.  Truth…I don’t mind waking up with her so much.  She nurses and we cuddle.

4.  I am celebrating we have officially made it to a year with Patrice nursing and I still have frozen milk in the freezer.  Yipee!!!!!  What a lot of stress off my shoulders.

5.  Caitlyn got two Venus Fly Trap plants for her Birthday.  Hubby and the older girls are feeding them ants right now.  The lady at the store says they are very hardy and can live 20+ years.  Um, Caitlyn, that thing goes with you when you leave for college!

6.  My husband is about the funniest person alive. He just explained to the girls we can’t feed the plants Roly Poly bugs because “they don’t have much meat on them.” With a straight face!

7.  I couldn’t bear to leave Patrice in the church nursery last week.  Our church has a great one, but every week I cry at the time away from my baby.  This week I just sobbed.  I have a hard enough time leaving her for work, when I have to.  This week it was just too much to leave her in nursery.  I ended up going back and getting her.

8.  Today Patrice cried for the first time when I left her at daycare.  Then Caitlyn joined in, then my friend’s twin boys lifted thier voices, along with other baby there.  By the time I left for work, 5 out of the 7 kids in the house were crying.  My friend handled it beautifully and called me within minutes to let me know they were all calm again.

9.  Sue’s imaginary friends keep getting her in trouble.  Last night I ended up yelling at her AND her imaginary friends.  Sigh.

10.  Caitlyn asked Jesus into her heart on her birthday.  Praise the Lord!

What happened in your life this week?  Join us in linking up!