Category Archives: Thought provoking Thursday

Posted on June 21, 2011 | 1 comment

To all my #ppdchat mama’s this is for you! And anyone else who is struggling through each day.

Also linking this up for Thought Provoking Thursday.

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Posted in depression, Thought provoking Thursday

Multitude Mondays that Could Double for a Wordless Wednesday

Posted on June 14, 2011 | 2 comments

I read a quote today from A.W Tozer “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us.” That really boils it down for me. There are many facets of me, I work, I sew, I run. I am a friend, sister, daughter. But what do I think about when I think about God? My girls and my husband. I am mother and wife. And I love it. More than I ever dreamed I could.

For this I am very thankful.

121.

122.

123.

What comes to mind when you think about God? Instead of berating yourself for letting your mind wander, take a moment and see what the Lord reveals about you as you open your heart ears to Him.

What are you thankful for?

Check out great posts at Thought Provoking Thursday.

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Posted in blog hops, multitude mondays, Thought provoking Thursday

Praying and Providing

Posted on June 5, 2011 | 3 comments

I have been praying for the Lord to provide for us in a big, big way. Huge. Feels like one of the biggest prayers of my life. I cannot fathom how the Lord is going to be able to do this. It is just too big for my brain. I am praying that is the way He likes it. Trust me, as His answer unfolds, we will only be able to stand back and declare, “See what the Lord has done on our behalf!” And there will be no way for anyone to argue it was not a miracle.

In the process of praying, I have been praying and reading scriptures about not being afraid. About God’s provision. About peace.

Have I mentioned, what I am praying for is beyond my wildest dreams and beyond comprehension?

But I have seen the Lord work mightily. Maybe not in how I would expect, but mightily. Take the running I am always blogging about…10 years ago I was in and out of a wheelchair due to Multiple Sclerosis. Trust me, no one ever thought I would run for fun at that point. No one. Actually at the time, a doctor told me he thought I would walk again but he didn’t know when. Fast forward a few months, and a friend gave me the name of a neurologist who specializes in MS. He started treating the MS aggressively. And he encouraged me to dream again. I got married. My health stabilized for just a minute…hubby and I decided to dare to start a family…my doctor was all for it. 11 months later Caitlyn was born… Remember that minute that my health stabilized? It has now last almost 6 years. No one can quite explain it, as far as we can figure, the horomone changes related to pregnancy and nursing have changed the behavior of my MS. I have gone from being sick most of the time, to never. Praise the Lord! He chose to move mightily on my behalf…

There have been other times and I will share more as I walk this new journey of trusting the Lord. Please feel free to share some of your own stories in the comments below…we can all stand to hear how the Lord works!!!

3 Comments

Posted in Multiple Sclerosis, praying, Thought provoking Thursday

God Sized Dreams

Posted on May 31, 2011 | 2 comments

Have you ever had a God sized dream? Meaning, something so big, it is humanly impossible, only God can accomplish it?

I tend to keep my dreams manageable, wouldn’t want to be disappointed when things don’t come about as I desire. But is that the right thing to do? Where does that leave God? If everything we ask for is humanly possible, doesn’t that leave God out?

Recently, I have begun praying for something that is a God sized dream. My thoughts are consumed by it. I have been praying for this “thing” to happen for 5 years, but honestly, I couldn’t see how it would so I made life okay even if the answer was no. And so far, the answer has been no. Pretty much what I expected.

What if the Lord doesn’t want to do what is expected, but by asking, without really believing, aren’t I telling Him He can’t do it?

I don’t want to limit God, I want to live in the fullness of what He has for our family. And right now I believe that is in praying very specifically for this God sized dream.

With God’s power working in us, God can do much more than anything we can ask or imagine. To Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus for all time forever and ever, Amen. Ephesians 3:20-21

What has the Lord asked you to pray for that was beyond you? What does He have you praying for right now? How can I join you in praying?

Check out what others are thinking about…

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Posted in blog hops, praying, Thought provoking Thursday

I Am No Theologian

Posted on May 15, 2011 | 7 comments

I am no theologian. Let’s just get that out there. But I am a Christian. And there are a few things I believe to be true.

I believe Jesus is the Son of God, that He was born a man of the virgin Mary, that He lived a sinless life, died on the cross for our sins, rose from the grave after three days and ascended back into heaven where He sits at the right hand of God the Father.

I belive in the power of prayer. I believe it is important to have that communication with God. I believe He always hears us. I believe He answers in the way He sees fit. I know it is not always the way I think He should answer. I believe He is able to heal us of all diseases and does so. I believe sometimes He heals without the use of medicine, I believe sometimes He waits until we are in heaven to heal us completely. And I believe sometimes He uses medicine to bring about healing in our lives.

And I believe that sometimes that is not the way I wish He would do things. I most certainly wish the postpartum depression were gone. I wish it would have never come in the first place. I could have lived my whole life without experiencing the depression and anxiety of the last 9 months.

When it became apparent the postpartum depression was not going to leave on it’s own, my midwife and I began talking about possibly using an antidepressant. I really struggled with that. I really struggled with not being able to read my Bible enough or pray enough to get rid of the depression and anxiety. I worried about what needing medication for my mental health would do to my witness as a Christian. Would people see that as a failing in my faith? Would it make non-believers, and believers, think my faith wasn’t strong enough or my God wasn’t big enough?

To be honest, I still worry and wonder. Am I weak? Am I not allowing God to work mightily enough in my life?

My friend Ali talked about postpartum depression in one of her recent posts. She asks some very important questions, including am I overtired, am I exercising enough, and the tougher ones, how is my prayer life, am I spending time reading my Bible. Everything she asks are valid questions. And important to ask. And I have asked them. And they are a key place to start before making any decisions. We do need to be taking care of ourselves in the basics of our physical life and our spiritual life. Things go sideways when we are not doing so. Rough times gets rougher if we don’t take care of ourselves.

And I will admit, I am lacking in some of those areas. Could this time with postpartum depression be easier if I weren’t? Maybe. Do I wish I could pray my way out of this? Definitely!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But after asking myself the questions Ali brings up, I found something was still needed.

Right now the Lord is working in my life through medication and treatment, through help from other Christians lifting me up and carrying me, through introducing me to other ladies who are walking the same road of PPD. I don’t know why I must go through the PPD, but through it seems to be my only option. So I walk through it. I cast my burdens upon the Lord. I ask others to lift me up in prayer. And I learn to trust the Lord more. He knows the plans He has for me. He knows why I am walking the road I am on. He knows He is not punishing me. He knows what the future holds. And I know I will be okay because I know He holds the future. And He holds me.

I pray you are able to let Him hold you in whatever joy or struggle you are living right now. I pray He is drawing you closer to Himself regardless of the circumstances of your life. And I pray my struggle with PPD has not confused your view of God. He is all powerful to heal and to save. I am frail and weak, but He is not. Please know God wants to know you personally. He wants to walk with you throughout all that is in your life.

Please let my blog, thoughts and Christian walk point you toward God, not away. I am by no means perfect, but I desire to see the Lord working in my life and in yours. Please ask me questions if something you see in my life is confusing, please ask if there is something I can join you in praying about. Please know my heart is to see His glory, no matter how I might be acting! Please.

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Posted in An Ordinary Mom, blog hops, depression, Faith, Postpartum Depression, Thought provoking Thursday

A Few Random Musings

Posted on May 4, 2011 | 5 comments

I am not full of answers right now, I am more of a gloomy guss, truth be told, so today I just have questions.

Why must we hurt? I am in the best time of my life with three perfect little girls and the postpartum depression and anxiety threaten to overtake me.

Why must we cry? I cry but it brings no relief so then I just feel spent and stupid.

I wish there was more, but that is what I have right now. What are you thinking about for Thought Provoking Thursday?

I started to push publish, but that is not quite all there is on my heart. In the midst of struggles, I am thankful for

Glimpses of spring
Text, e-mail and Twitter friends
A lovely daughter who loves to do chores with mama
Little girl smiles and giggles
Ruffle butt baby jeans

What are you thankful for?

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Posted in blog hops, random thoughts, thankful on a Thursday, Thought provoking Thursday

Health as Important to God

Posted on April 28, 2011 | Leave a comment

As you may know, I have been trying a few different things to lose the weight I gained with Miss Patrice. I want to do it wisely and safely for nursing the baby, but I also want to see enough progress to keep me motivated.

I started on a points plan, but have realized there is just too much going on in my life to be keeping track of each bite. So what to do? Then I looked into doing an elimination diet to see if getting rid of some things would help me overcome my postpartum anxiety. I read up on one of the right carb diets and was ready to start it, but then had a really rough week with the postpartum issues and felt totally overwhelmed at any type of diet plan.

But even in my antsiness, I noticed I was reading about the need to get rid of sugar from a number or sources, for a number of reasons. Over and over I heard the same message…get rid of the sugar foods.

So I decided to take the plunge. It has now been 72+ hours since I last had sugary food. I am not restricting my diet in other ways; this just seemed to be the message I kept hearing.

That got me to thinking…

How much does God care about our health? How much does he care about our diet? I know there are scriptures about gluttony, “Don’t drink too much wine or eat too much food” Proverbs 23:20 and I have always been taught that 1 Corinthians 6:19a teaches we are to take care of our bodies, “You should know that your body is a temple for the Holy Spirit who is in you…”

But what does that mean? Does it mean eating is sin? Does it mean not exercising is sin? I don’t know. But I am getting the message that God wants me to pray about my health. Not just, “Please Lord, let me lose some weight this week.” I am thinking more along the lines of offering Him what I eat or how much I exercise and see where He leads it. Offering Him how much I want to eat the chocolate candies in the trail mix and checking my desires against His will for my health.

For right now, that means taking the junk food out of my diet. That has been impressed upon me from several directions, including this post. Where will it take me? Physically, I pray it will help with my weight. Emotionally, I pray it will help with my anxiety. Spiritually, I pray it will teach me more about obedience to Him in my life.

What has you thinking? Share it here.

Prayer Time

Posted on April 12, 2011 | 1 comment

Some things seem like they should be easy to pray for. They come to mind often throughout the day. So, I pray for them a lot, right? Well, not always. Lots of times my brain stews on the topics, trying to sort it out or make sense of it. But I never actually form a prayer.

I think of my children many times a day, but I often find myself making plans instead of praying. I think of my hubby over and over, but often find myself thinking about things he has done, projects we are working on, instead of praying. I love the church we attend and often think of the blessing it is to our family, but forget to form the words of a prayer.

There are a couple things during the day I want to make sure I pray for. There is a ministry that means a great deal to me. I have committed to praying for them daily; I set an alarm on my phone to remind me. There are also a number of dear people in my life, family and frends that I want to make sure I lift up before the throne. They get an alarm on my phone as well.

I may pray for them when they come to mind at other times, but there is at least one time each day these precious people are covered in a prayer. Other things, friends have asked me to pray for. Some get a specific time, others get a moment or two when the Lord brings them to mind. I find both ways to be a blessing to me, as I pray they are for the people I am lifting up.

Praying is a gift we can freely give to others and it gives back to us as well. It is not possible for me to pray for a person or situation without also being blessed.

How do you remember to pray for someone or something? Do you have a list you look at each day? Do you wait for them to come to mind? Do you have set times you pray throughout the day?

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Posted in blog hops, praying, Thought provoking Thursday

Leaping Hearts

Posted on April 3, 2011 | 2 comments

I remember opening an e-mail several years ago from this guy I was kind of interested in, thinking I might really like where this dating relationship seemed to be headed. He was such a nice guy. He might seem quiet to some, but to me he was funny and fantastic at asking questions to draw other people out.

I remember how my heart leapt when I opened one particular e-mail he sent, I read the card he had created on-line for me, and knew right then, my heart was his, hook, line and sinker. The card was of a fish swimming and in it he asked me to go to dinner with him before a Bible Study we both attended. It was an easy question to answer–YES!

My heart still leaps for him 7 1/2 years later. I still get a kick out of the fun text messages he sends me, I love watching him play with our kids, he has blessed me like I could never have imagined when I opened that e-mail. He brings much joy to my heart.

My heart also leaps when I see my daughter’s try a new task, when I see them excited about something they learned at church. This week my heart has leapt several times as Caitlyn brought me her Jesus Story Book Bible* to read the next part of the Easter Story.

I pray my heart will continue to leap at the things of the Lord, in Thankfulness for my family, of His work in my life. I desire for my girls to see there is joy in following Jesus. May they see mama and daddy leaping at the Lord’s work. Lord, make my heart soft toward your leading, toward what brings you joy.

What makes your heart leap? How might the Lord use that for His glory?

*if you are looking for a great Bible for preschoolers, check out the Jesus Storybook Bible.

The Jesus Storybook Bible: Every Story Whispers His Name

By Sally Lloyd-Jones / Zonderkidz

The Jesus Storybook Bible tells the story beneath all the stories in the Bible. At the center of the story is a baby, the child upon whom everything will depend. Every story whispers his name. From Noah to Moses to the great King David–every story points to him. He is like the missing piece in a puzzle–the piece that makes all the other pieces fit together. From the Old Testament through the New Testament, as the story unfolds, children will pick up the clues and piece together the puzzle. A Bible like no other, this book invites children to join in the greatest of all adventures, to discover for themselves that Jesus is at the center of God’s great story of salvation–and at the center of their story too. Recommended for ages 4 to 8.

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Posted in Thought provoking Thursday

The First Step

Posted on March 28, 2011 | 7 comments

The first step feels good. The second step feels a little crazy. I wonder what I was thinking. How far will I make it. I reduce my goal for today. I just don’t think I am going to make it. Then I start to think about making it to the end of this street. Next up to the traffic light. On to a light 1/2 a mile away.

As I go, my thoughts and feelings change. I start noticing the scenery around me. Praying for friends and situations. Slowly I realize my legs are no longer burning and my lungs are not gasping for the energy to go on. And I begin moving my goal further out. No longer, will I make it another step, rather, can I go to the next goal. My feet no longer fight moving, instead they echo a refrain, “Thank you Lord for each step I take. Thank you for the doctors who believed in a better day for me. Thank you.”

Ten years ago I was in a wheelchair and on high doses of steroids just to keep functioning. The Multiple Sclerosis was interrupting more days than not. I began to resign myself to always being sick, always being dependent on medications that made me sicker even as they helped my body function. I didn’t dream of running. I dreamt of a day where I didn’t struggle to get from beginning to end.

The Lord used a brilliant doctor, some decent medications and the hormones of childbearing to bring me a healing I had decided was unlikely to be mine until I saw Him in Glory. Today and every day I endeavor to thank the Lord for the renewed strength my body has with my words, thoughts and deeds. Those thoughts and deeds are never as present as when I am running.

May I never stop thinking and thanking the Lord for His gift to myself and my family. I pray I am always like the one leper who came back and thanked Christ for healing him. I pray I use every opportunity to tell the reason for the hope I have been given.