Days come and days go.
Cleaning the house. No really, I do clean the house.
Chasing kids.
Playing with kids.
Reading books.
Going to church.
Sleeping.
I do my thing.
The meds do their thing.
And I wonder why the Bipolar was ever such a big deal.
Until a day happens. A day like yesterday.
Due to a snafu between the pharmacy and the doctor office, I ran out of one of my anchor meds, one of the big guns that keep me sorted out and stable. I can miss a dose here and there, but it is truly not a good idea to do so.
But it happens.
And I think, “ah, I’ll be fine.”
That was me yesterday.
I had a list of things to do.
I had all but one of my meds.
No big deal, right?
So I started in on the to-do list. And the anxiety came. The hyperventilating. The shaking came. Only to be followed by tears. Until I reached the realization I could not do it all. That there is a reason I am on several meds and I no longer work outside the home. I ended up in bed for the afternoon. I wanted to be all my husband needed me to be, but I just couldn’t.
I, like everyone, have limits, mine are just pretty close and tight. There is little wriggle room.
The Bipolar is a big deal.
*I got my meds today, I took them as soon as I picked them up from the pharmacy. Today is a little shaky, but I know I am back on the road to okay. So thankful for the grace my husband, children, and God extend to me.
Survive til you Thrive!
