Please read all of this.
All to the Glory of God–that is why I blog and share my story so openly. I want others to know it is possible to live and parent well with mental illness. This, by necessity, causes my posts to be brutally honest, and that is not always pretty.
I have always endeavored to live by the verse 2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
I have never been the strongest cookie. I wasn’t good at physical things growing up. I wasn’t a strong kid. And then the Multiple Sclerosis came and I became even weaker. My needs grew exponentially as my body failed me. It wasn’t easy, but I had this verse to cling to. Then I went into remission from the MS. I thought I was free from weakness. I guess I thought I would be able to stand on my “own two feet,” but even during this time of apparent strength, that was not the case.
I have always needed Him. I have always needed to rest on Him, the Solid Rock. Personally, I believe we all do, that is where true peace comes from. Now, I am also aware that may sound ridiculous coming from a woman who is on anxiety medications. If true peace comes from Christ, shouldn’t I be without anxiety? I can’t completely answer that. To my satisfaction, or likely to yours, but I know it to be true. I also know that I have a few illnesses, which happen to be messing with that peace and, at times, my mind, just like diabetics have an illness that mess with their pancreas. And just like a diabetic, there are medications and tools out there to help me live a strong and healthy life.
Every.single.day I utilize those tools. I take my medications as prescribed, I work with my doctors, I work with my husband, and I take care of myself. Some days, that taking care of myself looks scary as I end up in the hospital or I blog something really dark, or reach out to others for help.
It may look scary, I’ll give you that, but it is never without hope and it is never without utmost care for my husband and children. I hate taking my meds, I hate going to the hospital but I love Caitlyn, Sue, and Patrice enough to always be working toward strength and wellness for them. I love my hubby enough to take the steps I need to every day to be here every day.
Those days sometimes look messy, and just reading a blog may make them scarier, but know my husband and girls are always safe. Always.
I share my journey here in hopes of showing others they can live and parent well with mental illness. That may open myself up to a lot more questions about my health and well being than I might have if I kept my journey quiet and that’s okay.
Please, if you ever have questions or concerns about my journey, my family’s journey, or what you read here, please feel free to contact me. I would be more than willing to share with you how we promote and protect the health of our children, our marriage, and our family.
All to the Glory of God.